I had a pretty rough day yesterday,as well as the computer playing all sorts of silly games with me and that ended up with the loss of a post I had done and the comments that went with it,it also ended up with the loss of a whole days researching,it had taken me hours to find and download the relevant pieces I required and just as I went to back it up and then to download it onto my file disc the comp threw a wobbly and wiped the lot.
But it seems that wasn`t enough to be visited on me. I had waited all day for my Brother to bring the money he borrowed,ah I didnt mention that he came again on Sunday this time he stayed a bit longer but he still wanted money,I gave him my last fiver and he said he would come tuesday and pay it back. I know that I should have just written it off but I believed he would come. Unfortunately when he did it wasn`t quite what I expected. I had given up on him coming at all,in fact I had given up on everything nothing I did was right,and I decided to just shut everything down and curl up in a corner with a book. Then the buzzer went,some strange guy telling me that I needed to come downstairs as my brother had had an accident. I flew down the stairs not even locking the door and he is laid in the road,the ambulance is there,two of them actually,and they are trying to talk to him and all he keeps saying is my sister lives in there,I was imagining all kinds of things. Expecting to see blood and God knows what. It turns out he had fallen over,he walks with a stick now since last year. And he keeps having blackouts he fell a few weeks ago and broke two ribs. We finally managed to get him off the floor and into the back of the ambulance. It had to be obvious to the medics that he had been drinking,yet again,it was to me,but they were lovely with him,they kept asking him questions and he came out with all this unintelligabe whiney stuff. In the end they decided to take him home as his son was at home and no apparent injuries could be found.They thanked me for coming to help them and once outside the ambulance the driver started asking me questions. They knew he had been drinking,he was a lovely man and apologised for bringing me downstairs to deal with it. I told him no apology was neccesary and yes I would have gone to the hospital with him had it been required.
When I got back into the apartment I realised that it was rush hour,I was dressed in my stay at home clothes,my hair was loose and I must have looked like something the cat dragged in!!
No wonder the guy who had buzzed me to come down was staring at me? I had thanked him as well by the way,he did eventually leave when we got in the back of the ambulance. Though he did keep asking if there was anything he could do,bless him.
The brother I knew is gone and in his place is this person that wants the attention and the sympathy and the drink to get him through his days,he is lost in a world none of us can enter tormented by his own demons that none of us can help vanquish.
The trouble is I already have a lost brother seems now I have two.